Edgeworth's Best Day Ever
by MadManMatt64
Summary: The most hated Ace Attorney character gets her just deserts. K  because I'm paranoid.


Edgeworth's Best Day Ever

It was Put Dangerous and Nonsensical Things Outside Your Window Day at the Prosecutor's Office. Miles Edgeworth was just about finished installing the giant trampoline outside his window when he heard stomping outside in the hallway. Ignoring it, he bolted the last bolt into the bracket, and stood back to admire his handy work. It was a 20x20 foot blue trampoline that was pretty expensive, but this day only came once every ten years, so it didn't matter. His back was still to the door when he heard it fly open, so when it did he assumed it was his fiance Franziska (for even though they were betrothed, she still didn't knock on his door).

Without looking to who it was that opened the door, he said with a disinterested tone of voice, "Yes what is it?"

Then he heard the bone-chilling, high pitched voice, "EDGEY-POO! I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME!" 

Miles felt as though is soul was crushed. Turning around slowly he saw the one person he never wanted to see in his life ever since that Steel Samurai case all those years ago. The Wicked Witch of the Witness Stand herself, Wendy Oldbag. He took a shaky and shallow breath, "H-Hello Ms. Oldhag- I-I mean Oldbag. To what do I owe the... pleasure?"

She looked like she had ran for miles just to see him, and knowing her she probably did, "Edgey-poo, I can't believe you! I thought you were different from those other slobs, but nope, you're just as bad! The minute I turn my back you had to run of with some other girl and get engaged to her too! Why back when I was younger men never left the girl they first meet and always kept by there side, but men today don't have any respect for women anymore, its like the moment a man sees a girl a a smidgen more good-looking then the one their with, they dump 'em at the side of the road, men like that need to be punished don't you think, like when they cheat on a woman they should be cursed so that when they go to sleep they go to some nightmare tower and and have to keep climbing up it because if they don't they fall and then they die in real life when they do, doesn't that seem like a-"

"Ms. Oldbag!", Miles shouted, "Just tell me why your here."

She smirked, "Well the reason I came here is so that I can give you another chance."

Miles was confused, "Another chance?"

Oldbag still smirked, "Yep. Dump that little manic you call a fiance and give me the ring."

Mile visibly flinched as he thought, "_Isn't that contradictory of what she said earlier?_", and then said, "I've wanted to say this for a while now Ms. Oldbag."

She looked expectantly into Miles' eyes. He then said, "I don't like you. Not at all. I find that your obsession for me is disgusting and ever since the moment we first met I have always wanted to get as far away as possible from you. So if you could please leave."

Oldbag looked like she had just been kicked in the shins. But then for some reason her expression softened into worry. She then said, "Oh, Edgey-poo! Its worse then I thought."

Again Miles was confused, "What is?"

She almost looked horrified now, "She whipped your love for me out of you didn't she! She made you forget about how we loved each other!"

Now it was Miles that looked horrified, "NO! I just-"

He was cut off when she said, "Let me help you remember Edgey-poo!"

With that she ran with open arms to Miles. Not wanting to get hugged (or worse) by probably the most obsessive woman on the planet, he jumped to the side behind his desk. Oldbag however, because of her momentum from running, couldn't stop and she tripped over the shelf that came before the window, and with a tremendous crash fell out of the window. Fear not readers, as she did not fall to her death, but rather onto the trampoline. She finally stopped dead center and stood up while shouting, "EDGEY-POO HELP MEEEEEEEE!"

When Edgeworth got up and saw the predicament that Ms. Oldbag was in, he put on a smirk. He shouted back, "I will, but before you do, could you jump as high as you can?"

She smiled, "Of course, Edgey-poo!"

She then jumped surprisingly high for a person of her age, but that was what Miles was planing. When she came back down the trampoline turned concave and then sent Oldbag high into the sky. As she was sent flying Miles heard a knock at the open door. Turning around he saw both Phoenix and Franziska standing at the doorway. After Miles asked why they were here, Phoenix answered, "I came over to say that I passed the BAR exam but then I heard the old hag in here so I went to go get Franziska to help out."

Miles was smiling, "Well I don't think I need the help anymore."

Franziska looked at him with an eyebrow raised, "And why not Miles?"

He gestured to the window. Looking outside the saw nothing but a giant trampoline. As they were about to ask what they were supposed to see Miles told them to look up. When they did they saw a sight that made them the happiest lawyers on the face of the planet; Wendy Oldbag was sailing through the air at breakneck speeds. She kept getting smaller and smaller until she turned into a twinkle in the sky. She would land safely three weeks later... on the same exact trampoline that he still kept outside his window just in case she came back down. This was her punishment for annoying the Hell out of every single lawyer she came across, leaving out important pieces of testimony, and assuming that she was always right.

Back to Miles, because he had taught Wendy Oldbag her lesson, he became revered at the Prosecutor's Office and later that night got a little *wink* *wink* *nudge* *nudge* *click* *click* *cat call* from Franziska.


End file.
